И АКО НЕ ПОЛУДЕЯ...

НО АЗ ТЕ ВИЖДАМ СВЕТЪЛ И КРАСИВ
В ОЧИТЕ ИМАМ САМО ТЪМНИНА

I'm floating
in seas of hormones, no
that body
half a country away, yesterday
I turned you on with my words and the
idea of that fucked me up so much I
couldn't stand it, so I
took a nap and in my sleep
saw you touching me so vividly
I woke up with an orgasm and
this is insane, you're a digital ghost
I touched you once, and I remember
like I've hugged you a million times and
this is fucked as can be why does it always have to be
I'm floating
you're perfect
and you're a million kilometers away
why does it have to be
I have to get out of his
fuck somebody I don't care about
with your general body type
imagine it's you
pale soft skin, hell
hang myself, can't stand
the enormity of my desire
this can't be simulated
can't be in my head cause my body reacts to you with no conscious thought of it
karmic, sun opposite my moon, my lilith on your sun, your moon in my 7th, my moon on your mars
I feel like a creep this is unnatural
shit I wanna do to you
no better than a man, that's me
so i lie down in the meadow
on a blanket woven by my great great grandma
and I turn on Mila Robert's new album
and I dream of you and your legs wrapped around mine and
I WANT I WANT I WANT I WANT I WANT


I'm in love with a digital ghost
there is nowhere to put the enormity of my desire
I want to open up your arteries with my bare teeth is how much i want that thin pale body I
I'm disgusting myself
with the amount of yearning involved
I salivate, I get wetter than ever
I cum in my sleep from vivid visions of what could be
is it you doing this?
I haven't even fucked you once
no better than a creepy man
I DON'T WANT ANYBODY ELSE
WHEN I THINK ABOUT YOU I TOUCH MYSELF

Keep an eye on me yeah 

Eat your lionheart out 

All those burner accounts 

Lucky I tend to never shut my mouth 

you got quite some entertainment 

Watch me already do shit you’d never 

watch me get my life together 

my art and my rehab work 

my writing and my brain I got back 

Watch me, take some notes 

I was born to destroy those like you 

Watch me as I slay abusers by existing, 

sober and alive, just that 

I got two degrees already 

Exhibition in October 

met a man I’m gonna marry 

and your ass still on modafinil 

Watch me, watch me 

I only dare brag cause 

I know you got erry resource to get better, 

yet you consciously choose not to 

So rot in your gutter, 

with the teen girls codependent 

with the ugly ass face tats and the 

wonky ass teen haircut 

Watch me grow up as you dismember yourself 

limb by limb , till nothings left

 💉МЛАДОСТ, НЯМА РАДОСТ💉

I owe to stay alive and sober to god, to mom, 

and all our dead friends: Zara, Valyo and Omori I owe 

I owe myself to never get back in that hole of a life 

I owe myself to thrive, be human 

Literally just to show you I cost more than a black eye 

I’m God’s chosen one you’ll see 

All that esoteric shit I’d blab about 

unlike you, I view it as a mission 

Not a badge on my ego 

I got shit to do and if I die 

or live whatever you call life 

I fail all those we love that couldn’t make it 

I fail my own true will 

my moral standing 

You’re not over me 

Cause I got info 

I could doxx you, your birth name 

I can tell them all the shit you said 

and you ain’t got nothin on me, 

truth is on my side, a few friends 

All you got now is some meth 

Hell I could go tho the police

 if I were not an anarchist

ILL STAY ALIVE OUT OF SHEER ANGER

 ILL SURVIVE OUTTA SPITE

 ILL STAY ALIVE OUT OF RAGE 

ILL SHOW THOSE LIKE YOU 

I CAN BITE BACK 

COCKROACH WOMAN, LIVING PLAGUE 

ILL WEAR YOUR FUCKING BLOOD AS LIPSTICK 

AS I KISS MY CHILDREN GOODNIGHT 

QUEER AND ALL NEURODIVINE 

ILL SURVIVE OUT OF PRIDE 

THE WORLD NEEDS FREAKS THAT SURVIVED 

YEAH WATCH ME, WATCH ME AS I THRIVE

ХЕЙ ХЕЙ НЕЯ   Я НЯМА

ХЕЙ ХЕЙ НЕЯ Я НЯМА

 САМО ДА МОЖЕХ ЩЯХ ОТНОВО ДА СЕ ПРИСТРАСТЯ

САМО ДА МОЖЕХ ЩЯХ ОТНОВО ДА СЕ ПРИСТРАСТЯ

И с‘я?

Счупена, счупена

малко повече стрес в шибаната работа

и вече ти викам, а е минало к‘во

месец и половина ли

СЕГА СИ ПРЕДСТАВИ СЕДМИЦА. ПРЕДСТАВИ СИ СЕДМИЦА

ДА СЪМ ТИ НА ГЛАВАТА И

ДА СЕ СПРАВЯШ С

ВСИЧКИТЕ МИ НЕРВИЧКИ, СРИВОВЕ, ТРИГЪРИ,

ЛЕКАРСТВА, МАНИПУЛАЦИИ, ХИПЕРСЕКСУАЛНОСТ,

ПОСТОЯННА НУЖДА ДА МИ НАПОМНИШ

ЧЕ НЕ МИСЛИШ, ЧЕ СЪМ БОКЛУК

ПАК И ПАК И ПАК

КАЖИ МИ, ЧЕ НЕ СЪМ БОКЛУК

КАЖИ МИ, ЧЕ НЕ МЕ МРАЗИШ

ПАК И ПАК, СИГУРНО

АКО МИ КАЖЕШ „НЕ МИСЛЯ, ЧЕ СИ НАЙ-ДОЛНАТА ГНЯС НА СВЕТА“

ПО ВРЕМЕ НА СЕКС, ЩЕ СВЪРША

счупена счупена

пак крещя

понякога съм жесток и уморен и т.н.

умна и с чашка Е

заслужава ли си, като се обричаш да си

Болногледач на свободна практика?

Никога няма пак

да обичам без мисълта,

че с любовта ми убих Зара

и така завинаги

няма никога повече да погледна

ЕЛЕ ПА СИНИ ОЧИ

и да не се сетя, че

едни перманентно изстинаха

заради мене и това, че избраха

да се върнат при мен, знаейки

ТОЧНО КОЛКО СЪМ ПРЕЕБАНА

ИЗРОД, СЕЕЩ САМО СМЪРТ

И ОЩЕ ТРАВМА.

ПРИРОДНО СЧУПЕНА

ГРЕШКА НА ПРИРОДАТА

И ЗА ДА Я ЖЕЛАЕШ НАОКОЛО

ИЛИ СИ СЪЩИЯ ИЗРОД, ЛУД,

ИЛИ МНОГО СИ СЕ ОБЪРКАЛ

И СИ ТЪП НА КУЧЕ, И НЕ ЗНАЕШ

КАКВО ТЕ ЧАКА

НАИВНИК ИДЕАЛИСТИЧЕН

БЕГАЙ С ТРИСТА

БЕГАЙ СЪС СКОРОСТТА НА СВЕТЛИНАТА, ГОСПОДИ,

ОМРЪЗНА МИ

жена с чудовище между краката

ям ги, майко алена, майко на изродите,

ям ги с долните устни

не съм спряла, уж съм добре, а

завинаги съм твоята

непоправимо ОПУСТОШЕНА

Блудна дъщеря.

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